My Journey with God

This is my response to the challenge issued by my sister in law Brandi Cade (see blog post: http://brandislifesong.blogspot.com/2014/09/psalm-2222-i-will-declare-thy-name-unto.html )

The challenge is to share my journey with God.

Hmmmm... God and I go way back, so this will take a hot minute!

I can't remember a moment in my life that I didn't believe.  I remember attending The Lutheran Church of the Redeemer in Savannah, GA.  I remember my Sunday School classroom, and singing in their spring play.

Let's start from the beginning, shall we?

I was baptized on October 21st, 1984.  I was 2 months old, and my parents did two things that day.   They promised to bring me to church on Sunday's, and to teach the love of God to me at home. They also handed me back to Jesus.  God had given me to them, and they had my forehead marked with the cross of the Lord, and on that day I became a child of God forever.  My life began.

Pastor Paul Baumgartner baptized me in the name of God.  My Godparents Gerry and Nan were there to promise to help my parents and to pray for me and my parents.

Another influence on my childhood was Pastor Earl Stephens, of Peace Lutheran Church in Tifton, GA.  My grandparents were founding members of the church and when we visited, we always made sure to attend service.  This was a valuable lesson.  No matter where I am, I want to be in church on Sunday.

My parents prayed with me every night at dinner.  Every night, my mom and dad prayed with me. They took me to church every Sunday and instilled in me the importance of time spent in worship. They gave me roots, roots that grow deep with a church.  They taught me to love others, to accept others in their own walks of Faith. They told me about Jesus.

Pastor Gary Safrit taught me my confirmation classes.  He taught me about what others believe.  He shared with me HIS story.  He walked with me in prayer, and prayed for me often. (He probably still does, he and the good Lord know I always need prayer!  You should ask him.)  And it was Pastor Safrit that asked me in front of the church if I believed, and I answered "I do, and I ask God to help me."  It was May 1999 that the church prayed for me, and Pastor Safrit traced the same cross that had been traced on my forehead by Pastor Baumgartner in 1984... I reaffirmed my baptism and became a confirmed believer!!

I may have been a believer, but that was just the "spark". "It only takes a spark to get a fire going."
I served the following year as President of the Lutheran Church Youth.  Then I was one of the few in history to serve a second year as President. I wrote my own devotions and went on some amazing youth retreats and worshiped God next to people I will never forget. I put my hands in the air and I sang his praise, sometimes moved so deeply to tears, and sometimes filled with so much joy my cheeks hurt from the grinning.

Y2K National Gathering in St. Louis, Missouri.  I danced and sang ON STAGE in front of over 50,000 Lutheran youth from around the country (and a few groups from around the world!).  I was part of the opening ceremony.
I saw God at that Gathering.  I saw him in people, in hearts, in minds, in music.  I felt him more than I ever had before. Many thanks to youth leader Marty Daigle - who organized the events that changed my life forever.  It is thanks to you that lived these moments that are such great treasures on my journey with God.

After high school, I had a really rough couple of years.  The devil took me places I never should have allowed him to take me.  But I was still God's child, and though I was lost- it wasn't long before I was found.

God found me.
This moment was not actually a good one.  Sometimes the wolves are already biting you before you reach out for the shepherd to pull you back into his arms.  My best friend was murdered.  When her aunt called me to tell me it was her... I remember falling to the floor.  I crumbled.  I was like a wounded, little lost sheep and I thought the crying would never ever stop.

God found me.  He scooped me up, dusted me off, even when I tried to pull away again- God took care of me. Just 6 months later- I started dating the love of my life, who would later become my husband.

Eric and I may have done things a little backwards, but God knows backwards and loves me the same.  God forgave me when I didn't deserve forgiveness.

Pastor Jerry Smith married Eric and I on September 18, 2004... that's right! Just 2 weeks from today, we will celebrate 10 years of marriage.
Eric and I pray with our children every night, just as mine did with me.
Pastor Jerry baptized both of my children, and we are doing our best to give them the same strong roots in church that we had.

My daughter loves to serve as acolyte.  She says she feels so special helping Pastor with worship, lighting the candles and helping with communion and offering.  My heart fills with joy seeing her love church as much as I did.  She's a great role model to her little sister.  There's that spark again! "And soon all those around can warm up in it's glowing."

I know my children will stray some day, I can only hope and pray for them, and do my best to teach them to follow God, and stay on the right path.  And when she does stray, teach them forgiveness by forgiving them and loving them the same.

"We love because Christ first loved us."

Pastor Mark Cerniglia and Pastor Sean Miller influenced me while one of my best friends Tabitha Hardison went through her sons cancer treatments and ultimate loss of her son.  Riley had stayed with me on many nights, and I loved him like he was my own.  One night, after cleaning him up because he had gotten sick, he looked at me and said "Aunt Stephy, I'll be ok".  You are right baby boy, you are ok!  You are with Jesus!  But oh how my heart breaks for I miss you so much!!

Last, but certainly not least... a little testimony, if you will.
"My God is so great, my God is so mighty, there's NOTHING my God cannot do!"

God has a little bit of a sense of humor.   I can testify to this.
I was pregnant with my second child when Eric and I realized the bills were more than the income and we needed to downsize.  By downsize, that meant move in with my parents for a little while.  During the move, there was a day which we had ran out of food completely at our house and had not yet moved in with my parents.  We also had not reached pay day yet and we were totally broke.  Mind you, I'm 6 months pregnant. I prayed at work, around 10:30am.   I prayed this exact prayer: "Father in Heaven, I ask for strength today.  If you will please help me make it to dinner, where my parents are feeding us. I ask this in your name, Amen."
Here's the humor.  After saying that prayer, I was called to the front of the office.  There stood one of my best friends Mariana Parra.  This conversation happened:

Me: Heyyy girl! What are you doing here?!
Anna: Honestly? I don't even know.  I got stuck in the wrong lane and nobody would let me in, so I had to turn on this road.  I saw your office up ahead and remembered I never bought you a birthday lunch...so, since I'm here, do you want to go?
Me: **burst into tears**

That happened?! I prayed and just 30 minutes later God had answered.  I had ZERO loaves of bread to make a sandwich and GOD FILLED MY PLATE (quite literally).   As I explained to Anna why I was crying, she cried with me.  She was just as shaken by God leading her to me.  She fed me, and I have never felt so full in all my life!  We also laughed.  How AWESOME it is to be loved by God (and by best friends).

God loves me. He really loves me.
WHAT'S THE BEST PART?! He loves you too. He LOVES you.  He sees you, He knows you, and He loves you.  Isn't God AWESOME?!

Apostle's Creed
I believe in God the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth.
I believe in Jesus Christ, His only son on earth, who was conceived by the Holy Spirit and born of the virgin Mary.  He suffered under Pontias Pilot, was crucified, died, and was buried.  He descended to the dead. On the third day, He rose again and is seated at the right hand of the Father. He will come again to judge the living and the dead. 
I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy catholic church, the communion of the saints, the forgiveness of sins, the Resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting. Amen

Too Positive.

"The capacity for hope is the most significant fact of life. It provides human beings with a sense of destination and the energy to get started." - Norman Cousins

I have the quote posted above printed and hanging next to my desk at work.  It's a reminder for me. Not only do I have the capacity for hope, but when I have hope, I will also have energy to make it through to my destination.

My husband recently accused me of being "too positive."
You see, he called me very upset about a member of his family being very sick.  He was not only sure this was the end, but already grieving.  You see, my husband is very negative. He sees the bad that can happen- and expects it to. Maybe that's why God paired us.  Because my "overly positive outlook" calmed his nerves, and gave him hope.  But his negative also brings my positive down a notch- reality is things do not always work out the way you hope they would. But at the same time- sometimes they do. My response to his accusation was "I have enough negative in my life- I don't have time to be negative. I must be positive or else I'll never make it through."

We need to stop this obsessive worrying and attempts to predict the future that only God holds. I'm guilty of this. Only God knows His plans for you. He answers every prayer with "Yes", "No", or "Not right now".

"Worrying does not take away tomorrow's troubles, it only takes away today's peace." - Unknown.

1 Peter 5:7 tells us "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you." 
And 1 Corinthians 13:13 tells us "and now these three remain: Faith, Hope, and Love...the greatest of these is Love."

Everyone is going through something.   And whatever it is that you are going through-my prayer for you is that your faith, no matter how small, keeps you grounded; your hope, even if lost, finds you and stays within your reach; and that you know that you are loved.

Try these 3 things every day:

* Smile at least once.  A good laugh is even better. If nothing at home can help you do that- Youtube has some hilarious videos, great comedians.  Find someone, something-- anything. Smile/laugh at least once every day.

* Hug someone.  Your spouse is a good person to hug. Or any family or friend- whoever is around. hug them. At least once every day.  a good hug does wonders for the soul. Hug yourself. "how do you hug yourself?" well- if you already found a reason to smile or laugh- that's one way to hug yourself. but I encourage you to actually wrap your arms around something. It could be a teddybear. we all need a hug.

* Say your prayers.  My 5 year old will say "DON'T FORGET TO SAY YOUR PRAYERS MOMMY!"... She is exactly right. Don't forget to pray. every day. Try, at least once a week, to pray with thankfulness, not hope for something you need/want. Just say thank you.  Jennifer Knapp's version of "Jesus Loves Me" asks the question towards the end "Do you love him? Does He know?  Jesus loves to hear us say, that we love Him every day.".... go ahead. tell God you love him, even if you are really mad at him.  He hears you. He sees you.  And He loves you back.